Haley's Story

The first day of cosmetology school, "Haley" sat down next to me. Close to me in age, super sassy, and loud-laughing, we bonded pretty easily. One afternoon in class, she mentioned she might be pregnant. I was skeptical, but recommended she take a pregnancy test to find out to be sure. The next Monday in class, she told me the test was positive and that she was going to “just get it taken care of.” She told her mom, who encouraged her to get an abortion immediately emphasizing that this was the “responsible decision.”

I asked her if she could go to the doctor to find out how far along she was and find out as much information about her pregnancy before making any decisions. She said she had no health insurance. I told her I knew of a place that had free ultrasounds and helpful information for people in Haley’s circumstance. I let Haley know that all I wanted was for her to be able to make an informed decision, and that she did not need to be pressured into any decision by me or her mom. Haley and I made arrangements to visit First Choice directly after class. I was immediately very impressed by the flexibility of First Choice. The mobile clinic traveled to us and made it as easy as possible to meet with Haley.

Haley had her first ultrasound, but it was too early in her pregnancy to detect a heartbeat. She was given a lot of information about her options and scheduled a follow up appointment set for a week and a half later. As reality set in and her mom continued to pressure her into an abortion, threatening to kick Haley out if she didn’t have an abortion. So, she set up an abortion appointment. Thankfully, due to snow, her appointment was rescheduled. I contacted Amber Lehman, the CEO of First Choice and she was able to move up the ultrasound appointment. I wanted to makes sure Haley was able to hear her baby’s heartbeat.

At the follow up appointment, Haley heard her baby’s heartbeat. She got to see a physical representation of the child she was carrying. She was giddy with excitement and could not stop smiling.  She wanted to keep her baby.  As the week wore on, so did the pressure from her mom. Haley’s mom said that if she keeps the baby, she would kick her out and no longer give her any financial support. She wavered in her decision, overwhelmed by the weight and responsibilities that this child would bring. I introduced her to a friend who had been in a similar situation a few years before and had chosen life. Amber and I introduced her to a family who was ready and willing to take her in and help her through this pregnancy. She left that meeting encouraged and ready to tell her mom of her decision.

Around midnight that night, she texted me and asked to be picked up. She told her mom of her decision to choose life for her baby, and her mom, screaming and cussing at her, told Haley to leave. That night, I took her to my cousin’s house. She was proud and relieved that she had stood up to her mother, but fearful of what was ahead for Haley and her baby.

We all breathed a sigh of relief, she was out of the toxic environment with her mother. After a long weekend and a few snow days, left to her own devices and overwhelmed with what the cost of living on your own would mean, Haley doubted her decision. The next time I saw her, she told me she had decided to have the baby aborted. I was completely stunned and caught off guard. I told her that she had options, support, and help and though it would not be easy, it could be done! She informed me she was leaving class early, meeting up with her mom, and going straight to her appointment.

After having the abortion, Haley has had serious doubts about her decision to abort her baby. She has struggled with extreme sadness and anger. Haley is covering this depression with partying, alcohol and drugs. She is grasping at some very dangerous straws to try and get out from under her mother’s roof and away from her guilt.

When Haley decided to have the abortion I felt defeated and angry. This was unfair for this innocent baby’s life. This was an action that could not be taken back. I did not understand how a good God could allow someone to act so selfishly. But He did. And he’s graciously allowed me to be a part of her life. He taught me how to love her and how to offer grace in a situation beyond my control that I did not understand. My prayer is for Haley’s redemption. That she will know true freedom. I also pray that she will come to rest in that fact that her baby is with the King of Kings, and that same King who is ready to redeem and restore her as well.